We have been in contact, and I am truly impressed with her professionalism and her concern for children. We have written the following statement that we would like to share:
“We would like to release a public statement on the need for a respectful national conversation on mental health. Whatever our prior disagreements, we both believe that the stigma attached to mental illness needs to end. We need to provide affordable, quality mental health care for families. We need to provide support for families who have a relative who is struggling.
“We both agree that privacy for family members, especially children, is important. Neither of us anticipated the viral response to our posts. We love our children and hope you will respect their privacy.
“Our nation has suffered enough in the aftermath of Newtown. We are not interested in being part of a ‘mommy war’. We are interested in opening a serious conversation on what can be done for families in need. Let’s work together and make our country better.”
Thanks, all!
256 comments:
«Oldest ‹Older 201 – 256 of 256Liza -
I would like to commend you for recognizing and admitting that your son has a problem and getting him help. Please don't stop getting him the help he needs. I would also like to thank you for being brave enough to share it publicly. Perhaps it could help someone who doesn't recognize or refuses to recognize the signs in their own child. If you haven't seen the movie, We Need to Talk About Kevin, you should. It speaks volumes to people who are experiencing this with their own child and it truly is an eye opener. As a mother, my heart aches for for you. I pray for you, your son and your family.
Sincerely.
May I suggest that you consider forming a G+ community of parents who are intersted in supporting each other and advocating for Mental Health support?
What a great blog, kudos to you for being a parent not just letting things slide with your son. He needs help and you are clearly his spokesperson. I cannot wait to finish reading your blogs! there will always be negative people who do not actively listen or read with the intent to understand. We need more blogs like and more people that have the intelligence to understand and have compassion for what they do not understand. Kudos!
Dear Anarchist Soccer Mom,
I feel for Michael, you and your family because Michael's story sounds eerily similar to mine. I believe my remedy will help many of our children with this rage problem. Below is a list of sweeteners and food additives that absolutely cause me to rage and become depressed for no apparent reason.
I am now 53 and grew up on the east coast of the US as a polite, intelligent, musically advanced, athletic, involved kid... most of the time. Except when I flew into rages or became suicidal for little to no apparent reason. I spent the vast majority of my rage beating on my drums, many times to complete exhaustion.
From about age 24 I began trying to solve my problem with the help of doctors, therapists, nutritionists, self medication, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera.
I found peace after I stopped eating sugar cane based products about the age of 40.
The following list is what I do NOT eat (anything made from sugarcane) including:
White sugar, brown sugar, organic sugar, turbinado sugar, molasses, cane juice,
evaporated cane juice, caramel color, mono sodium glutamate (MSG), sodium erythorbate, maltodextrin (from any source)
This next list of things I have slowly weeded out of my diet with better and better results:
corn syrup, high fructose corn syrup, glucose, glucose-fructose syrup,
sucrose, dextrose, sorbitol, aspartame, Splenda brand sweetener (which is mostly maltodextrin).
Sweeteners that are OK
Maple syrup, agave syrup, brown rice syrup, honey (in small amounts) xylitol, maltitol, aceulfame-potassium, isomalt, Fruitsource®, malt
If your child has a problem similar to mine remove these things from their diet. All it takes is a willingness to read every INGREDIENT list. Do not rely on the nutrition list, even if it says less than 1%. I have found any amount is bad for me.
Try it for a week or two. I noticed a change in myself after about 4 days when I removed the most easily found sugar on labels. I have found that just eating real food is the best. We eat as “clean” as possible. Mainly fresh fruits and vegetables, real meats, fish and poultry, without processing, no genetic modification or hormones added.
But don't worry, there are some prepackaged fun foods (chips, ice cream, chocolate, cookies) to eat without sugar. Imagine Foods, Rice Dream, Smart food are some of the products we buy. Always read the labels of anything you or your child plan to eat. We have approached this as a whole family endeavor even though my wife does not react like I do. Our boys do show some problems with sugar but less than I do. As our boys are growing up we started by watching their food intake diligently. Now they have become experts at reading labels and choose not to eat sugar since they can now recognize the problems it causes them.
Sugar and the above sweeteners are used in things you might not expect, as filler or for other reasons, and may not be listed if the product is not meant for ingestion. I have found these sweeteners in just about every product type we use including soap, shaving cream, hand lotions, shampoo, acne pads, table salt, mayonnaise, mustard, ketchup, pickles, vitamins, pain relievers, cold remedies, health supplements, flavored chips and other snacks. And don't be fooled by Organic products. Organic sugar is still sugar and causes problems.
Check out this article By Nina Bai, December 10, 2008 for a little insight
http://blogs.discovermagazine.com/discoblog/?p=1187#.UNItuRzF85U
As an adult autistic with abusive parents for whom I was NEVER good enough, I do not forgive you. I hate you. Forever.
Every time some child abuser like you does some evil crap like this everyone urges people with autism to "stop and think of what they are going through"... no one EVER stops to think about what hell we have to endure with parents like you.
Thanks by the way for contributing to a national conversation in which me and my son are portrayed as "violent potential murders". THANKS SO MUCH. My son has been walking around crying for days about how "I don't even like guns, I'm scared of them!" THANK YOU. SO MUCH.
Eric, I agree. I think there are many children that have behavioral disorders that really need parents to go through parenting classes and medicaiton is not the answer. It happeend to my child at age 14.. All the professionals saw his video game addiction and extremely difficult behavior as mental issue, but after 1 1/2 years of many misdiagnoses, in the end we, the parents needed parenting therapy. We needed a multi systemic therapist to realize this. Many psychiatrists are too quick to give out medications when there is no psychiatric illness and after years of meds and misdiagnoses, the real problem is never addressed, behavioral issues. Unfortunately, we need to be smarter than the so drs. It was the most difficult year and a half of my life. If I did not continue to search for the answer, who knows where my son woud be rather than as a successful college graduate.
I couldn't agree more. I don't know what the answers are- I know the stakes are high and the situation tenuous. We need to pull our collective heads out of the sand and provide care where care is needed. This needs to be about compassion not fear. How can I help?
The difference between the comment leavers on Sarahs blog and here is enormous. Impulsive and rude versus concerned and thoughtful from what I can see. I think your post was extraordinary and I cannot begin to comprehend my days spent with someone I love desperately but who also scares me. Sharing your experience will surely help someone. I do wish you had not posted the photo of your son though. Unless you actually believe him to be beyond help and headed for the front page of the papers, there was no reason to put him out there like that.
How does publicly slandering your own child help a "serious conversation on what can be done for families in need"? I don't know how you can sleep at night.
I think you were able to anticipate the viral response when you agreed to republish on Huffington Post.
If you really want to make your country better, and I believe you do, look to yourself.
When you talk about having a discussion about mental health, and what can be done for families in need: this is it.
http://core.eqi.org/tgordon.htm
How Children Really React to Control
Thomas Gordon
"Punitive discipline is by definition need-depriving as opposed to need-satisfying."
When one person tries to control another, you can always expect some kind of reaction from the controllee. The use of power involves two people in a special kind of relationship - one wielding power, and the other reacting to it.
This seemingly obvious fact is not usually dealt with in the writings of the dare-to-discipline advocates. Invariably, they leave the child out of the formula, omitting any reference to how the youngster reacts to the control of his or her parents or teachers.
They insist, "Parents must set limits," but seldom say anything about how children respond to having their needs denied in this way. "Parents should not be afraid to exercise their authority," they counsel, but rarely mention how youngsters react to authority-based coercion. By omitting the child from the interaction, the discipline advocates leave the impression that the child submits willingly and consistently to adults' power and does precisely what is demanded.
These are actual quotes from the many power-to-the-parent books I've collected along the way:
"Be firm but fair."
"Insist that your children obey."
"Don't be afraid to express disapproval by spanking."
"There are times when you have to say 'no'."
"Discipline with love."
"Demonstrate your parental right to lead."
"The toddler should be taught to obey and yield to parental leadership."
What these books have in common is advocacy of the use of power-based discipline with no mention of how children react to it. In other words, the dare-to-discipline advocates never present power-based discipline in full, as a cause-and-effect phenomenon, an action-and-reaction event.
This omission is important, for it implies that all children passively submit to adult demands, perfectly content and secure in an obedient role, first in relationships with their parents and teachers and, eventually, with all adult power-wielders they might encounter.
However, I have found not a shred of evidence to support this view. In fact, as most of us remember only too well from our childhood, we did almost anything we could to defend against power-based control. We tried to avoid it, postpone it, weaken it, avert it, escape from it. We lied, we put the blame on someone else, we tattled, hid, pleaded, begged for mercy, or promised we would never do it again.
We also experienced punitive discipline as embarrassing, demeaning, humiliating, frightening, and painful. To be coerced into doing something against our will was a personal insult and an affront to our dignity, an act that devalued the importance of our needs.
The hope that children eventually will submit to all authority is, I think, wishful thinking. Not all children submit when adults try to control them. In fact, children respond with a wide variety of reactions, an assortment of behaviors. Psychologists call these reactions "coping behaviors" or "coping mechanisms".
The Coping Mechanisms Children Use
Over the years I have compiled a long list of the various coping mechanisms youngsters use when adults try to control them. This list comes primarily out of our Parent Effectiveness Training (P.E.T.) and Teacher Effectiveness Training (T.E.T.) classes, where we employ a simple but revealing classroom exercise. Participants are asked to recall the specific ways they themselves coped with power-based discipline when they were youngsters. The question yields nearly identical lists in every class, which confirms how universal children's coping mechanisms are. The complete list is reproduced below, in no particular order. Note how varied these recurring themes are. (Can you pick out the particular coping methods you employed as a youngster?)
Resisting, defying, being negative
Rebelling, disobeying, being insubordinate, sassing
Retaliating, striking back, counterattacking, vandalizing
Hitting, being belligerent, combative
Breaking rules and laws
Throwing temper tantrums, getting angry
Lying, deceiving, hiding the truth
Blaming others, tattling, telling on others
Bossing or bullying others
Banding together, forming alliances, organizing against the adult
Apple-polishing, buttering up, soft-soaping, bootlicking, currying favor with adults
Withdrawing, fantasizing, daydreaming
Competing, needing to win, hating to lose, needing to look good, making others look bad
Giving up, feeling defeated, loafing, goofing off
Leaving, escaping, staying away from home, running away, quitting school, cutting classes
Not talking, ignoring, using the silent treatment, writing the adult off, keeping one's distance
Crying, weeping; feeling depressed or hopeless
Becoming fearful, shy, timid, afraid to speak up, hesitant to try anything new
Needing reassurance, seeking constant approval, feeling insecure
Getting sick, developing psychosomatic ailments
Overeating, excessive dieting
Being submissive, conforming, complying; being dutiful, docile, apple-polishing, being a goody-goody, teacher's pet
Drinking heavily, using drugs
Cheating in school, plagiarizing
As you might expect, after parents and teachers in the class generate their list, and realize that it was created out of their own experience, they invariably make such comments as:
"Why would anyone want to use power, if these are the behaviors it produces?"
"All of these coping mechanisms are behaviors that I wouldn't want to see in my children [or my students]."
"I don't see in the list any good effects or positive behaviors."
"If we reacted to power in those ways when we were kids, our own children certainly will, too."
After this exercise, some parents and teachers undergo a 180-degree shift in their thinking. They see much more clearly that power creates the very behavior patterns they most dislike in children! They begin to understand that as parents and teachers they are paying a terrible price for using power: they are causing their children or students to develop habits, traits, and characteristics considered both unacceptable by most adults and unhealthy by mental health professionals.
THE NO-LOSE METHOD OF CONFLICT RESOLUTION
Although getting youngsters to participate in mutual rule-setting significantly prevents a lot of adult-child conflicts in families and in classrooms, conflicts will always arise for which no rules have been previously established. Parents and teachers have to deal constructively with these unexpected situations or else their relationships will suffer. Most teachers and parents, with few exceptions, are locked into "either-or" thinking about resolving conflicts with children: They are either strict or lenient, either tough or easy, either authoritarian or permissive, either their solution in the conflict prevails or the youngster's solution prevails. In our classes we show how both of these "either-or" approaches to conflict resolution are win-lose methods-either the adult wins and the child loses or the child wins and the adult loses.
A father shows this either-or thinking when he describes the power struggle in the parents' relationships with their children in this excerpt from a recorded interview:
You have to start early letting them know who's boss. Otherwise they'll take advantage of you and dominate you. That's the trouble with my wife-she always ends up letting the kids win all the battles. She gives in all the time and the kids know it.
Children, too, see their conflicts with adults as win-lose power struggles. Cathy, a bright 15-year-old, expressed this clearly in a recorded interview:
What's the use of arguing? They always win. I know that before we ever get into an argument. They're always going to get their way. After all, they are the parents. They always know they're right. So, now I just don't get into arguments. I walk away and don't talk to them. Course it bugs them when I do that, but I don't care.
In P.E.T. and T.E.T. we teach parents and teachers how to resolve conflicts with an alternative method called the No-Lose Method (or the Win-Win Method), in which both the adult and the child participate in a process of six separate steps:
Step I: defining the conflict in terms of needs
Step II: generating possible solutions
Step III: evaluating the possible solutions
Step IV: reaching an agreement on the best solution
Step V: determining what is required to implement the solution
Step VI: evaluating the effectiveness of the solution
Readers may recognize that these six steps are similar to John Dewey's six steps for effective individual problem solving. We have found they work equally as well as steps for effective resolution of conflicts between individuals.
The No-Lose Method of resolving conflicts requires a firm commitment to an entirely different posture from that assumed in the traditional win-lose methods. The parent or teacher conveys this message to the child:
We have a conflict-a problem to be solved. I don't want to use power to win at the expense of your losing. But I don't want to give in and let you win at the expense of my losing. So let's put our heads together and search for a solution we can both accept.
The No-Lose Method derives its influence from Authority "C," the authority derived from people having made a mutual commitment to an agreed upon solution.
CONCLUSION
Despite the universal use of rewards and punishment in families and schools, I have found abundant evidence of the ineffectiveness of both as a method of control. In addition, punitive discipline itself has been shown to be deleterious to the physical and mental health of children.
Since the early 1960s I have been deeply involved in offering training to parents and teachers in non-power and non-controlling methods, which I firmly believe are far more effective than discipline in influencing children to be cooperative, considerate, responsible, and, above all, self-disciplined. I have briefly described these methods, documenting their positive effects on children's mental health.
These non-power methods add up to a new and far more effective model of parenting and teaching. By giving up using power, parents and teachers will foster self-disciplined children. By relating to children democratically and refusing to be either dictators or doormats, parents and teachers will increase children's compliance with rules through involving them in the process of making the rules. By helping youngsters find their own solutions to problems, parents and teachers will foster more independence, more control over their own destiny, and higher self-esteem. By involving children in their own learning process and in the process of governing their classrooms and schools, teachers will make schooling far more interesting, prevent disciplinary problems, and foster higher achievement motivation.
And by making a commitment to resolve all conflicts with children so nobody loses, parents and teachers will equip children with the skills to become a new species of world citizen-persons who will eschew the use of violence in dealing with conflicts between individuals, between groups, between nations.
No one has expressed more clearly how power-based methods create psychopathology than Abraham Maslow (1970):
Let people realize clearly that every time they threaten someone or humiliate or hurt unnecessarily or dominate or reject another human being they become forces for the creation of psychopathology, even if these be small forces. Let them recognize that every man who is kind, helpful, decent, psychologically democratic, affectionate, and warm is a psychotherapist's force even though a small one.
see my posts on the previous article. on Dec 20
I know the causes and have the solutions.
Psych Drugs & the hospitals are NOT help. THey are the problem.
God is the answer. He heals mental and physical problems, thru Jesus.
see my FREE book
mESSAGE TO FAMILIES OF MENTAL PATIENTS at 1prophetspeaks.com
also on Blogger at
http://www.1prophetspeaks.blogspot.com/2012/07/message-to-families-of-mental-patients.html
The drugs are the problem, not the solution, and psych hospitals are NOT HELP. THEY are concentration camps, literally a continuation of the genocide by the nazis of metnal patients, using drugs, in the secret t4 euthenasia program. Dr Peter Breggin (Http://www.breggin.com) first exposed this and has written many books warning about toxic psych drugs and ect. In a case where he testified, a Canadian judge ruled that prozac caused a teen to commit homicide.
The drugs Cause mental illness, suicicde & homicide. They are DEADLY BY DESIGN. They cause brain, kidney, liver damage, obesity, diabet.
ALl the mass shooters were on them. THe columbine shooters were on them and took a Death Ed Class. They were hypnotised by the drugs and programmed by the class. One of them said he had nightmares about shotting people after taking the class. THey were used, set up. IN the 90s many schools had death ed and the suicide rates shot up.
The same social engineers run mental health and education.
See article "Quotes showing the real agendas behind mental health and education" at 1prophetspeaks.com
(Http://www.1prophetspeaks.blogspot.com/2011/12/quotes-showing-real-agendas-behind.html
They are: genocide, mind control, world government, atheism.
Aldous Huxley in Brave new World described a fascist society where everyone was druggge for control. He was a social engineer insider and the book is their blueprint. He said " a scientific fascism wil be easy to sell the masses".
The social engineers in the US & UK who supported eugenics and euthenasia funded Hitler and run mental health.
One of the agendas is depopulaton of the planet by 90%. THey are using healthcare to do it thru deadly drugs, poisoned vaccines, food, water & more.
It is all orwellian doublespeak.
I can tell you unequivocally that
One of your main problems is the HARRY POTTER BOOKS> GET RID OF THEM> THey are openings for demonic spirits, which cause mental illness, curses and all kinds of problems, physical illnesses, affect electronics, everything. They are an opening for spirits of witchcraft.
The new testament is clear that mental and physical illnesses are caused by demonic spirits whose assignemtns are the names of those diseases. Jesus rebuked them and gave his followers authority to do it. It works. I have done it; I have rebuked canc-, asthm-, depress-.
If people have any illness, FIRST CLEAN OUT YOUR HOUSE> 90% of the reason for these problems is environmental.
Other openings for demonic oppression are sin:, bad music, books, art, occult objects, video games, symbols like peace signs which are really demonic.
Whatever spirit inspires a book, music etc will be near it and transmit to whoever uses it or has it. When it is removed, the oppression leaves. It is also good to rebuke any demonic spirit in Jesus name that was in the place after removing it.
eVEN IF YOU PRAY FOR HEALING, IF YOU DON'T GET RID OF THE STUFF THE AFFLICTION WILL RETURN.
Drugs are openings for demonic spirits; including caffeine, nicotine, alcohol, pot, lsd etc and all psych meds. THis is why the psych drugs cause mental illness.
The spirits jump around thru verbal contact. Hence, if yoiu drink caffeine, your kid couild have ADHD. Caffeine is an opening for spirits of mani-, agit-, confus-, addict- What is around US spiritually affects everyone we interact with. They don't necessarily have a condition; we infest them with ours! If they are sensitive, it means they are more susceptible to the toxins others use! This is WHY they seem autistic - they can't tolerate the interactions from others due to this reason!
Many people who are thoughnt to be autistic are really CALLED to be Prophets of God. They are spirityually sensitive so they can fulfill this calling by learning to discern what is FROM GOD as opposed to what is NOT. Prophets have to speak from the Holy SPIrit, not others; so the sensitivity is there to tell us, but it can be very oppressive. I am a prophetess and know the calling. When I am around people who smoke for ex, i have often gotten physical cuts in my toes; physical manifestations telling me they have an unclean spirit. THere is a Gift in the new testament called diserning of spirits. I prayed for it; then started having this kind of physical reaction to them. When people speak curses, something that I would need to rebuke, I have often gotten pain my ear. It is a way of knowing that there IS a curse operating that one needs to rebuke. Sol all this sensitivity is really a spiritual discernment that others don't necessarily have. Autistic kids are there as a signpost to tell others what is also around them, like a canary in the mine!
My book talks about this.
Also God sent me into the psych system to be a witness and write a Free book
Manual for Transformatinal Healing-God's Answer to Psychiatry
which exposes atheistic psychiatry & their genocide & tells how to heal mental and physical illness thru prayer and worship.
I can tell you unequivocally that
One of your main problems is the HARRY POTTER BOOKS> GET RID OF THEM> THey are openings for demonic spirits, which cause mental illness, curses and all kinds of problems, physical illnesses, affect electronics, everything. They are an opening for spirits of witchcraft.
The new testament is clear that mental and physical illnesses are caused by demonic spirits whose assignemtns are the names of those diseases. Jesus rebuked them and gave his followers authority to do it. It works. I have done it; I have rebuked canc-, asthm-, depress-.
If people have any illness, FIRST CLEAN OUT YOUR HOUSE> 90% of the reason for these problems is environmental.
Other openings for demonic oppression are sin:, bad music, books, art, occult objects, video games, symbols like peace signs which are really demonic.
Whatever spirit inspires a book, music etc will be near it and transmit to whoever uses it or has it. When it is removed, the oppression leaves. It is also good to rebuke any demonic spirit in Jesus name that was in the place after removing it.
eVEN IF YOU PRAY FOR HEALING, IF YOU DON'T GET RID OF THE STUFF THE AFFLICTION WILL RETURN.
Drugs are openings for demonic spirits; including caffeine, nicotine, alcohol, pot, lsd etc and all psych meds. THis is why the psych drugs cause mental illness.
The spirits jump around thru verbal contact. Hence, if yoiu drink caffeine, your kid couild have ADHD. Caffeine is an opening for spirits of mani-, agit-, confus-, addict- What is around US spiritually affects everyone we interact with. They don't necessarily have a condition; we infest them with ours! If they are sensitive, it means they are more susceptible to the toxins others use! This is WHY they seem autistic - they can't tolerate the interactions from others due to this reason!
Many people who are thoughnt to be autistic are really CALLED to be Prophets of God. They are spirityually sensitive so they can fulfill this calling by learning to discern what is FROM GOD as opposed to what is NOT. Prophets have to speak from the Holy SPIrit, not others; so the sensitivity is there to tell us, but it can be very oppressive. I am a prophetess and know the calling. When I am around people who smoke for ex, i have often gotten physical cuts in my toes; physical manifestations telling me they have an unclean spirit. THere is a Gift in the new testament called diserning of spirits. I prayed for it; then started having this kind of physical reaction to them. When people speak curses, something that I would need to rebuke, I have often gotten pain my ear. It is a way of knowing that there IS a curse operating that one needs to rebuke. Sol all this sensitivity is really a spiritual discernment that others don't necessarily have. Autistic kids are there as a signpost to tell others what is also around them, like a canary in the mine!
My book talks about this.
Also God sent me into the psych system to be a witness and write a Free book
Manual for Transformatinal Healing-God's Answer to Psychiatry
which exposes atheistic psychiatry & their genocide & tells how to heal mental and physical illness thru prayer and worship.
I can tell you unequivocally that
One of your main problems is the HARRY POTTER BOOKS> GET RID OF THEM> THey are openings for demonic spirits, which cause mental illness, curses and all kinds of problems, physical illnesses, affect electronics, everything. They are an opening for spirits of witchcraft.
The new testament is clear that mental and physical illnesses are caused by demonic spirits whose assignemtns are the names of those diseases. Jesus rebuked them and gave his followers authority to do it. It works. I have done it; I have rebuked canc-, asthm-, depress-.
If people have any illness, FIRST CLEAN OUT YOUR HOUSE> 90% of the reason for these problems is environmental.
Other openings for demonic oppression are sin:, bad music, books, art, occult objects, video games, symbols like peace signs which are really demonic.
Whatever spirit inspires a book, music etc will be near it and transmit to whoever uses it or has it. When it is removed, the oppression leaves. It is also good to rebuke any demonic spirit in Jesus name that was in the place after removing it.
eVEN IF YOU PRAY FOR HEALING, IF YOU DON'T GET RID OF THE STUFF THE AFFLICTION WILL RETURN.
Drugs are openings for demonic spirits; including caffeine, nicotine, alcohol, pot, lsd etc and all psych meds. THis is why the psych drugs cause mental illness.
The spirits jump around thru verbal contact. Hence, if yoiu drink caffeine, your kid couild have ADHD. Caffeine is an opening for spirits of mani-, agit-, confus-, addict- What is around US spiritually affects everyone we interact with. They don't necessarily have a condition; we infest them with ours! If they are sensitive, it means they are more susceptible to the toxins others use! This is WHY they seem autistic - they can't tolerate the interactions from others due to this reason!
Many people who are thoughnt to be autistic are really CALLED to be Prophets of God. They are spirityually sensitive so they can fulfill this calling by learning to discern what is FROM GOD as opposed to what is NOT. Prophets have to speak from the Holy SPIrit, not others; so the sensitivity is there to tell us, but it can be very oppressive. I am a prophetess and know the calling. When I am around people who smoke for ex, i have often gotten physical cuts in my toes; physical manifestations telling me they have an unclean spirit. THere is a Gift in the new testament called diserning of spirits. I prayed for it; then started having this kind of physical reaction to them. When people speak curses, something that I would need to rebuke, I have often gotten pain my ear. It is a way of knowing that there IS a curse operating that one needs to rebuke. Sol all this sensitivity is really a spiritual discernment that others don't necessarily have. Autistic kids are there as a signpost to tell others what is also around them, like a canary in the mine!
My book talks about this.
Also God sent me into the psych system to be a witness and write a Free book
Manual for Transformatinal Healing-God's Answer to Psychiatry
which exposes atheistic psychiatry & their genocide & tells how to heal mental and physical illness thru prayer and worship.
It is great you have a piano. EVery kid should have one. Many are called to serve God with their music and if given an instrument at a small age, God will teach them how to play. I played since the age of 4; i didn't have lessons til 8.
I knew I was put on earth to do music and it is holy. In the old testament the musicians were prophets. All musicians are Called by God to be prophets, intercessors and healers. Spiritual sensitivity is part of that calling.
See my free book
What Kind of Musician Are You Going to Be-God's Call to Musicians. Musicians are called to be prophets, intercessors and healers. On worship, lyrics, drugs & mental illness.
at http://www.1prophetspeaks.com
The music business is run by people into witchcraft who pray dmeons onto the masters of all the records, since the 70s. Hence is is all spiriutally contaminated and causes metnal and physical illness. The people running it are Illuminati who are devil worshippers,. This testimony comes from John Todd, an illuminati bloodline member who ran the record labels and got saved in the 70s. His testimony on Youtube describes this. "Demons Behind the Music BUsiness-John Todd"
He also says to get a record deal one has to be a witch and to advance as a witch one has to be bisexual. THe music is being used to spew spirits of homosexuality into the public. Why> The social engineers want to depopulate the planet so they support gay sex, which is non-procreative, and it degrades people and breaks down families, one of their goals, so the state can raise kids and brainwash them, as described in Brave New World.
see my articles:
Illuminati Mind Control in Psych Drugs, Music & Education
http://www.1prophetspeaks.blogspot.com/2012/04/illuminati-mind-control-in-psych-drugs.htm.
I'm the father of a 24-year-old son whose behavior is similar to your son's. As my son progressed through his teenage years and the outbursts transitioned from crying fits to violent, raging fits, my wife and I decided that we weren't going to put our son in a mental institution. Thus, I spend multiple hours each day trying to help my son cope with the stresses and frustrations that come his way.
So, here are a few thoughts that may help:
1. As near as I can tell my son has intermittent explosive disorder (IED). Any psychiatrist will tell you that's unlikely since the anger and rage is supposed to be assigned to some other condition; however, like your son, mine is normal except when stressed or frustrated.
2. Since IED is rare there's very little help for it. We tried to get social security disability but were denied. I haven't met a psych professional yet who has any idea how to deal with IED.
3. The biggest problem with IED is that after the explosion my son starts a period of irrational rage. During this irrational period things like killing someone else or himself become viable solutions to the problem at hand. It takes me anywhere between 30 minutes to 2 hours to talk my son down to a rational state of mind. I don't say much, he just rants, but I can tell where he's at because the profanity fades away as he becomes rational. Eliminating any distractions ASAP helps dramatically (e.g. pull over the car, turn the tv off, go into another room, etc.).
4. It took me a while to realize that my son isn't choosing to explode. His behavior is due to a mental illness not a choice. It's hard for me to be verbally abused every day but I understand how important it is that I be on his side. We both fight the raging monster together.
5. Medicating my son has been very difficult. Things like xanax or percacet kind of work, but we have a hard time getting them because the doctors are afraid he is going to abuse them. We've tried over 20 different medications and the only one that is effective for my son is a specific strain of marijuana. I had to move my son from Utah to Colorado so he could get a medical marijuana card in order to have a consistent supply of this strain. I realize the problems that surround marijuana; however, I'd rather have those problems than the problems associated with my son being a mass murderer.
That's probably enough. I'm a left-brained introvert and have spent many years observing and analyzing my son's behavior and could go on and on.
I would like to start a conversation between parents of children with neurological disorders. Please view my blog http://lanza-epidemic-my-son-s-story.webnode.com/ all comments, stories, and suggestions are welcome. My hope is to find some answers on how better to help my son. Thank you.
I would like to start a conversation between parents of children with neurological disorders. Please view my blog http://lanza-epidemic-my-son-s-story.webnode.com/ all comments, stories, and suggestions are welcome. My hope is to find some answers on how better to help my son. Thank you.
I would like to start a conversation between parents of children with neurological disorders. Please view my blog http://lanza-epidemic-my-son-s-story.webnode.com/ all comments, stories, and suggestions are welcome. My hope is to find some answers on how better to help my son. Thank you.
I don't exactly like the way you write about your boy (I'm a fan of Alice Miller, sorry). But I have to say I respect you because facing this ex husband of yours and still taking care of four children without loosing it... well... you gotta respect that. I wish you strenght and loads of love and patience to deal with your bright and sensitive boy and your other children. Sorry about my English.
I was so inspired by this blog that I created a petition on www.WhiteHouse.com, hoping to convince to federal government to provide more funding for individuals and or/organizations related to mental health care. This petition will go public on their site once I can get 150 signatures. Please sign the petition, or at least share it with friends!
http://wh.gov/neWV
I would like to start a conversation between parents of children with neurological disorders. Please view my blog http://lanza-epidemic-my-son-s-story.webnode.com/ all comments, stories, and suggestions are welcome. My hope is to find some answers on how better to help my son. Thank you.
I am a host at KRXA 540am, I was wondering if Liza and or Sarah would be interested in an interview to discuss mental health and the article. I can be emailed at michelle@krxa540.com
Thank you
Liza:
I admire you for going public, and bringing to light the struggles of mentally disabled/disturbed children and their parents.
However, you were way too cavalier with his identifying info. His picture is now out for all to see. And like my dad said "Once it is out there it can't be taken back."
I suppose I understand why. I'm just against compromising the identity of another person no matter how noble the cause. People think that this breach of privacy less important since he's a child.
IMHO that makes it MORE important. Children are more vulnerable to abuse and they are less able to defend themselves. Especially children with disabilities like "Michael". Compromising a child's identity to the whole planet is just askin' for trouble.
I've been taking heat elsewhere on the net. They were all whining about "parents rights."
Parents may legally have a right to post a picture of their kid online but they also have a responsibility to protect them.
And maybe it's me, but I don't see how compromising a kid's identity, on the national stage, even for a worthy cause, protects them.
Because now everyone around him sees him as the next spree killer. The redneck Faux News watching reactionary sees him as a monster to take down before he shoots the school up. And the next sick freak sees someone no jury would believe. God forbid such a thing happen but more than a few parents can tell you such tragedies aren't out of the realm of possibility.
Parents play with their children's personal info at their child's peril. The Internet is unpredictable. Personal information, photos, etc. is not a parent's alone to gamble with.
Maybe the kid won't be affected in any way. But there are kids who posted their pictures, embarrassing stories and location info who didn't get so lucky. Some missed out on job opportunities, others got unwanted notoriety, and some got so much worse.
It should be enough to make a parent pause before telling everything about their kids on a so-called "mommy blog" or FB. Even for good reason.
Carrie, thanks for creating the White House petition.
While I am glad that you feel you have reached a form of detente with her, I still think she's a judgemental dope who thought she found a trackback gold mine with your brave, nakedly honest, warning siren post. Clearly she thinks her new PhD gives her some sort of authority on life perspective when in actuality it's only given her the excuse to hide from real life.
My prayers are with you that you are able to find some real support for your son whom you clearly love with all your heart.
WOW YOUR AFRAID OF YOUR SON??? HE HAS THREATENED TO KILL YOU????? IT PISSES ME OFF THAT MOTHERS HAVE ALL THESE WARNING SIGNS AND THEY IGNORE THEM IM HERE TO SAY *WARNING**WARNING**WARNING* HE NEEDS TO BE LOCKED UP IN A MENTAL FACILITY THAT HAS SOMEONE WITH PROFESSIONAL EXPERIENCE 100% OF THE TIME ITS MOTHERS LIKE YOU THAT SAY BUT MY CHILD IS SMART JUST A LITTLE DIFFERENT....THERE IS A REASON THEY HAVE THAT LITTLE SAYING......TO SMART FOR YOUR OWN GOOD.....AND THE FACT YOU THINK YOU CAN SIT HERE AND THINK YOUR CAPABLE TO HANDLE THE SITUATION WHEN YOUR CLEARLY NOT I PRAY TO GOD MY KIDS NEVER GO TO SCHOOL OR BE IN ANY PUBLIC PLACE WITH YOUR CHILD WHO IS A LOOSE CANNON AND AT ANY MOMENT HE CAN HURT SOMEONE OR WORSE KILL THEM.....I DO THINK IF YOUR CHILD DOES HURT SOMEONE YOU SHOULD BE HELD 100% ACCOUNTABLE FOR HIS ACTIONS BECAUSE YOU QUITE CLEARLY KNOW HE HAS ISSUES BUT YET YOU LET HIM SOCIALIZE WITH THE PUBLIC NANCY AND YOU ARE THE SAME WOMAN NAIVE AND FULL OF THEM SELVES WITH TO MUCH PRIDE TO GET THE CARE THEIR KIDS REALLY NEED BECAUSE YOU DONT WANT TO SAY YOUR KIDS IN A HOME FULL TIME CAUSE HE CANT MENTALLY HANDLE THE REAL WORLD HES IN A HOME GET A LIFE AND GET A CLUE
Rocheal,
Really? Let me guess, you are perfect as well as any children you might have. I won't result in name calling here like you did. I'm wondering though, are you teaching your children that the sort of behavior you have in your comment is acceptable? Isn't the hate I see in your words a form of bullying? Just an observation.
My children have never made me feel unsafe or threatened to hurt anyone its not bullying its facts there are warning signs parents ignore and then they are like "i dont know why this awful thing happened he used to kill animals but he liked to hunt so we thought it was ok" wake up smell the coffee what I said is the truth to many kids do not get what they need because parents think they can handle it when they cant and yes I am teaching my kids to be honest and to say exactly what they feel without sugar coating it I have taught them some soft hearted people will take offense to what they say but other people who are strong will respect their opinion and respect them for their honest because honesty hurtful or not is always better then not saying something and regretting it later any other questions????
Rocheal,
I will be the better person here and bite my tongue and not tell you honestly how I feel about you and your comments. I will say you have a lot of learning and growing up to do. Good luck to you.
I actually think your a worse person for not saying what you feel so bite your tongue till it bleeds and open your eyes to the real world your sitting there trying to tell someone who is grown to grow up because you dont agree with their statements shows you have a weak mind you are just as naive as the mother who wrote this and Nancy Lanza I would put money on the fact your kids are stronger then you and more then likely run over you thats why you have to reply to what im saying but then back down when you dont wanna hear anymore instead of debating it I will leave you with this statement I always tell my kids....Small Minds can't comprehend big spirits. To be great, you have to be willing to be mocked, hated, and misunderstood.....maybe you should take this advice too
You are a horrible breeder, you really, really are.
You are a horrible breeder and your entire family a waste of space.
I am the "father" Of Adam Lanza. I support you and hug my 19 year old son. I worry about him. You are correct in your post and I support you and thank you for saying what I am afraid to.
peace
John Grosskurth
This is incredibly annoying. Is this what blogging has become- releasing "PR statements"? Both of you are issuing a joint statement because you were both accused of capitalizing on the tragedy in Newtown. The integrity of blogging is compromised when faux PR statements are released due to controversial opinions being publicized. Just be yourselves ladies. You don't have to like each other or get along, and you definitely don't need to be releasing these Pollyanna statements together :::eye role:::
http://onlyifyoulistenautismspeaks.blogspot.com/
read my blog Liza, it might answer your questions.
Just a note to say I SUPPORT you as a blogger, mother, & advocate for your child.
What's with the negative comments? Am I missing something?
This is the problem w/ this country. We are secret keepers.
Thanks for speaking out...
NEVER STOP!!!
I am Lisa Long's Daughter
My mother labeled me as mentally ill when I was 12 to avoid taking on any responsibility for my issues. I was sent to mental hospitals. I was sent to a behavior modification facility. Countless doctors and lots of meds with horrible side effects. When I was 17, I was forced to sign a contract admitting I was mentally ill and promising to be on medication the rest of my life to get out of reform school. My mother wouldn’t rest until I had a diagnosis that absolved her. And yes, I yelled and screamed and acted out. I did so because I had no voice, no respect, and was not allowed to make any boundaries whatsoever. When I was 18 she gave me poetry she wrote that spoke of how she was a victim of my illness. I still remember the words "a child with a critical defect". I burned the poems but the words still haunt me to this day. I am an adult now with the perspective of 18 years of parenting my own child. We do need to change the conversation about mental illness in this country, but what Long ironically, and unintentionally points out, is that a big part of the conversation needs to be about the family dynamic. That parents contribute, that society contributes, and that no psychiatric professional and no prescription can heal the child of a mother with a victim complex until the family dynamic is addressed. As my mother does, Long's son has a right to privacy and anonymity. No Horrible tragedy takes away a mothers responsibility to protect her child. My heart goes out to Michael. He deserves better.
you call yourself an anarchist, maybe your son in out of control because your household is an anarchy, his father is not around obviously, just the occasional boyfriends you bring around. stop asking the government to raise you son for you, you do it yourself, you poison your son, you are scum
you call yourself an anarchist, maybe your son in out of control because your household is an anarchy, his father is not around obviously, just the occasional boyfriends you bring around. stop asking the government to raise you son for you, you do it yourself, you poison your son, you are scum
you call yourself an anarchist, maybe your son in out of control because your household is an anarchy, his father is not around obviously, just the occasional boyfriends you bring around. stop asking the government to raise you son for you, you do it yourself, you poison your son, you are scum
you call yourself an anarchist, maybe your son in out of control because your household is an anarchy, his father is not around obviously, just the occasional boyfriends you bring around. stop asking the government to raise you son for you, you do it yourself, you poison your son, you are scum
Ms. Long,
I realize I'm a little late and the storm has blown over. However, I would like to say something that comes from my personal experience having a psychopathic sibling. My parents did not stop and consider how he was acting around me when they were not there. Needless to say, his behaviour did not improve when he and I were alone. Your other children are at significant risk, not just from what they see their troubled sibling doing when supervision is around, but from how he is most certainly acting towards them when the children are alone.
I am not trying to demonize your troubled child. However, reality is reality, and your other children are in severe danger of development major mental health issues because of him. They may act okay now, but as they age and face adult responsibilities their issues will come out.
Please consider any and all steps required to keep your troubled child from impacting his siblings.
Liza,
I thank you for sharing your story - my kindest regards to those blessed with the privilege of not understanding what living with a mentally ill child is like. How could they know? The fact that our culture assumes all contuct problems and aggression stem from poor parenting is devistatingly dangerous to the families dealing with a child like this and trying despirately to get help. My husband and I have been to extreme lengths and efforts in treating our son's Conduct Disorder-Severe-Childhood Onset/ADHD/half dozen other minor diagnoses, and at the end of all of them found that the social services world provides one main option to a family: "You deal with it; we'll write a report once the worst happens." I do not intend this statement as a criticism of mental health and social service providers; most of them have been sincerely caring. Yet, we found that no solutions existed for us. Sadly, we made our own; it cost all we had to remove our son perminantly from our home to prevent him from killing our other children, but we did it. And it has been the best thing we could have done in a horrible situation. (To all who feel obligated to leverage your opinion regarding our choice, don't bother; just be grateful that you can't imagine doing the same. Count yourself lucky to not know or understand.) Liza, I urge you to look at the safety issues you are dealing with in your home from a more removed perspective. You are slowly accepting the abnormal as normal. This insidious process masks itself in the cloak of unconditional love and faithful duty. Be careful. Your other children need you to see them as well - to see their fear and pain and their need for a safe family. I'm not advocating relinquishing rights or responsibilities, but that you maintain your demand that safety be the first priority, no matter what. These kinds of conditions in one child devour families and destroy souls; remember that you have the right to keep your other children safe as well. To those reading who are interested in a national forum on health care for the mentally ill, I ask that you keep talking. If there had been any such help at the end of all our long efforts with our son, he would have remained a part of our family. I searched for any safe option, and there were none. Yes, we need to treat mental illness, and we need to help families dealing with major safety issues. Most psychiatric care facilities are good - the ones our son went to certainly treated him with kindness and dignity - but they are astronomically expensive, have long waiting lists and provide short term respite even in the face of ongoing danger to safety. "Help!" is right! There is a lot of help needed and it's damn hard to find and access it. Liza, good luck and God's grace. In parting I will tell you qualitatively that while your son's behavior is alarming and should be taken very seriously, it sounds like he has a conscience. If he does, thank God for that; you might have something to work with as you navigate your family's individual path.
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Full respect for this post Izrada sajtova
Thanks, please join the conversation www.tellingmysonsstory.com. #mentalhealth #autism
Thanks, please join the conversation www.tellingmysonsstory.com. #mentalhealth #autism
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Very helpful information. I wait for next article
Dana Pensiun
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